Drugs, a girl's best friend? Pros and Cons, discuss.

Word count: 3,129

Scenes: 3

I made Kael cry. o.O And I finally got inspired right after I started eating Midol. No, drugs don't help the writing AT ALL. *cough*

Um, that's all. I want to keep writing, but I'm suppose to be awake in six hours. So I should get on getting to sleep. *waves* *runs off*

EDIT: 1,586 words, an hour and a half and a scene later, I guess I really SHOULD go to sleep? ^_^

"And everybody was for fighting/wouldn't wanna waste a thing/ cold cold water bring me round..."

Free Jazz:
I am
listening
to
Emo
music
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENE, THAT IT DRIVES ME TO THIS?
Well, aside from the fact that everybody dies, and Kael goes crazy and kills herslf
...
I think I've identified the source of the problem.

So it's done. This scene is totally on drugs, but some kind of a pattern for the rewrite is down in text. I need to back this up... *runs away briefly*

I have to say though, this scene was insanely hard to write. It was the one that sparked this story for me in the first place, only by now all the characters are quite different, as well as the tech and what I have of plot. So I have this really vivid picture in my head, that doesn't WORK, so I have to keep shooing it away. Also, well, I'm writing from inside Kael's head. When you catch yourself thinking ~this would just make more sense if I was on drugs, then I could get the real feel of it~ this should be a sign to you that you have issues. I've only been trying to write it since Monday? *sigh* I can also attribute the hard-ness of the scene to the fact that I'm doing my traditional reaction to a Big Scene, and loosing interest, as well as doing my traditional reaction to The End Is In Sight, and saying I'm so close that it hardly matters, I can write that tomorrow. All very healthful and good for me. And my story.

HOWEVER.

And this is a big however. This scene OFFICIALLY marks the end of Kael's trauma. Everything from here out for her is good, even when it makes her cry. (Especially when it makes her cry.) Jennet is still going to be traumatized just a little, but I promise it's for the best! You get to be Kick-Ass, Jennet! Isn't that what you want?

I'll go sleep now. Tomorrow Dulamon gets to be awesome, and we make Kael cry! *happy smile*

Excerpt:

You Noticed!

Ouch.

Word Count: 2,238

Scenes: 2

Social day was lose. My eyes hurt. Plot is made of fail. I am no longer able to use the English Language. Not that I could before.

I had to attend a PET SHOW. *headdesk*

Excerpt:

Kael Flashback

Ahem. When I SHOULD have been cleaning my room, I discovered this. *chortles* I'm not sure how accurate they are, but, I found the quiz Very Amusing. Which is perhaps because I just woke up. *cough*

You should all take it. *pushes you towards quiz* :D

Kael is only a little like you. She isn't really very cool: she blends into crowds, she hangs out on the fringes at parties, and wearing shades after dark makes her run into things. She may have sometimes thought that she was special, or destined for greater things, but probably dismissed the idea as a fantasy. She's had more than her fair share of hard knocks, and probably spends more time than she ought moaning about it. And she's gotten no slack from you.

In general, you care deeply about Kael, but you're smart enough to let her stand on her own, without burdening her with your personal fantasies or propping her up with idealization and over-dramatization. Kael is a healthy character with a promising career ahead of her.

Score Breakdown:

I Love Her, I Let Her Go 9

You Mean Plaid Is Out? 7

I'm Destined For What? 3

Angst R Us 16

Momma HATES Her! 1

Total: 36

Jennet is only a little like you. She is not at all cool; in fact, she thinks cool is a temperature reading, and when she says "Oh, I just put on whatever old thing's lying around," she means "on the floor, where I threw it last night - but I turned the underwear inside out first." There's never been anything special about her that she could see; boy, is she in for a surprise. She's come in for her share of hurt, but gotten off with minor damage. And she's gotten no slack from you.

In general, you care deeply about Jennet, but you're smart enough to let her stand on her own, without burdening her with your personal fantasies or propping her up with idealization and over-dramatization. Jennet is a healthy character with a promising career ahead of her.

Score Breakdown:

I Love Her, I Let Her Go 7

She's The Anti-Cool 1

Plain Jane 1

Can't Complain 3

Momma HATES Her! 3

Total: 15

I blame today's word count on the fact that I fed the vampires.

Word Count: 1,730

Scenes: 1

Despite its lamentable word-count effects, I am resolute that donating blood is awesome. Just think about it. You go and sit in little plastic chairs and watch the various stages of nervousness around you, and you get to closely observe the different stages and types of fainting, for the mall fee of being prodded with needles and drained of your vital fluids. Plus you can save up to three lives. :D Which is a nice way to make up karmically for the day you spent torturing, drugging and seducing. *cough* Ahem. Plus, you are medically required to eat sugary things afterwards. Is there anything more awesome than that? I think not.

Oh, oh! And also, where else is it just assumed that you're a druggie (other than airport security,) and you have to show your needle-track-less arms to prove it?

I rest my case, awesomeness is proven.

Here, have some excerpt. Not from today, I don't trust any of it from today. :D

Gratuitous mind-rape, this way plz!

However, the NOT SLEEPING bit of donating blood is BAD.

Just a thought.

"Just get me through December, so I can start again..."

Word count: 5,064

Scene count: 1 (Oh yes, it was a doozy. I walked down corridors and sat in waiting rooms. And Kael fought people to make a point. Love that girl.)

Quality count: Ahahahahah. Ahahahahahh. Ahhahahah! See that? That is me not caring. That is me laughing in your FACE.

It's weird, because for the first time in forever, I'm back on the ship, where it all began. I haven't been there since November. November, Srsly! That's, like, last year. Dude..... Also, a lot has happened since then.

(Hurrah for stream-of-consciousness! I'm gonna say that I didn't work today, or yesterday, and I was trying to front-load words in those non-working days because I'm working all day for the rest of the week. Yes, that is fear you see in my eyes.)

A lot has happened in terms of how I write, in what has happened in my life, and what has happened to my characters. Some of them still haven't realized what has happened- I'm looking at you, Jennet- and some of them, well. Clones, you know what I mean. And Kael is just her own category. Of everything. But yeah, I'm back in an old setting, with old issues that I haven't had to deal with, cause we haven't had to deal with.

Like the whole motivation for why Jole went on this little jaunt? The one he told himself, at least? Yeah, that one didn't come up. Kael and the rest of the Drudges' precarious position as worthy-to-be-alive? Also taken for granted by the silly Clones. Social issues in Jennet's world? She kinda danced on those, and now her dancing is frowned on.

In addition, everyone's been living with the knowledge that they're gonna die within days, and now, hey, oops, we're still alive. How about that. *sheepish* Not to mention that certain people aren't quite as comfortable to be home as they're supposed to be, in fact they're downright suspicious. You see, since the end of November I've only been dealing with straightforward Bad Guys. These are easy to react too. He's a sadistic, messed up B**tard- RUN. Now we have my old friends the Good Guys back. The morally ambiguous people with lots of power, who might have your best interests at heart, it's just that they say they do so sincerely.... Do I believe them? Do I do what I was told? Do I follow the nice man? Or- do I even have any other options? A lot more uncertainty, obviously.

As might be clear, (I'm not sure if is is clear,) I enjoyed myself. ^_^ I actually want to write more, only it's hard to think, my eyes won't stay open, and I have to get up at 6 tomorrow. Yes, Snazel, you don't have to write about wrecked medical bays now. *vague smile*

"Confusion is always the most honest response."

Word Count: 1,855
Scenes: One? Kinda?

This started as one scene, but I"m going to need at least two more to close it up. Darn it. *growls* But in other news, Jole was awesome, and Kael was, well, Kael. You should hope to never meet her at work, that's all I'm saying.

Also, Root Beer cures all ills, I should try to drink it BEFORE 10:00.

“Silence does not necessarily mean a secret.”

"Yeah, with some people. Who you aren't."

Sarti and Kael, you are so much fun to write. *happy* I'm never sure what you're going to say. Not the most PC pair, those two. And soon you talk to Tenish! And Jaslyn! And Jole! Fun times on the horizon! 

And it's not really getting easier to write, no. I still look at my novel and go "mehhhhh...." But my oh my I love it so much. *grins madly* If I can just ignore the burning hatred of the quality of what I just wrote, and revel in my characters, it's SO MUCH FUN. So I'm basically in a passionately love-hate relationship with writing.  *ponders* That does seem to be pretty representative of me. And my relationships. And my sanity. *coughs*

But hurrah for writing Kael again! My crazy messed up girl. :D Tonight, we plan. *heroic music swells as I stare hungrily at my keyboard*

Oh wait, my parents have people downstairs. Which means that I have a nervous stomach ache. Which means that I either go down there in pain, or curl up on my bed and wait for them to go away. Decisions, decisions...

"Welcome to Women Now where women are trusted friends please put your hands where I can see them and surrender any bombs."

Yes, I watched Juno, as might be evident from my title. I've also been writing. 

*muses*

It is curiously liberating to just throw quality out the window, shred it into tiny pieces, jump up and down on it, douse it in gasoline, and shower it with lighted matches. It's the Nano state of mind, only more so. 

So, current state of affairs: Kael and all the Military are hungover, Bleach and Cole are sightseeing, the rest of the techs are cracking the world network, (assisted by the Military,) the Drudges are shopping, Appel is being interrogated, Jennet discovered an empty closet, and Dane and Very are being nauseating. I think Petria locked herself in the shower again too, which is related to Dane and Very being nauseating. That about covers it!

EDIT: Objective of the weekend- write 6k. Everyone else I know is juggling some combination of school, work, reading, and writing, so I can manage this, right? *crosses fingers*

"I have a song stuck in my head." "What song?" "I can't, tell you, the lyrics. Ahem."

I wrote over a thousand words today! I feel like a writer! Funny how as soon as Dulamon got Kael alone the story just whirred right along.  

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go make Jole insecure and mess with Jennet's head. It's a hard job, but someone needs to do it. :D

"We get to hallucinate too? I should have done this years ago!'

A shout out out to each of my poor mistreated (main) characters. :D

Tenish: You're made of awesome. You're SO made of awesome. I'm sorry about what I'm going to do to you, I really am. But you'll get through it- you're made of awesome.

Haggerty: Watch your mouth, man. Though you probably did get me 200 extra words for that scene alone, not to mention the whole "fighting the guest" deal. I, ah, don't quite know if I like you or not.

Neph: See, aren't you glad you survived? You have the potential to be made of awesome, I just know it. *hugs him*

Jole: You poor man. Uh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry? I'll get you out in the end, I SWEAR!

Bleach: You're an arrogant S.O.B. and you need to bleed. I'm sorry I wasn't able to show that yet. It will come, though, never fear.

Etna: Life happens, we know. I'll get them out safe. I'm sorry? I'll just be, uh, over here. Please don't look at me.

Jaslyn: You're hard core, woman. *runs away*

Sarti: See, aren't you glad you unexpectedly turned out to be a druggie? Now you get to play with ships, and hallucinate and stuff! *sheepish* I'll, uh, find you a nice guy. *cough* *backs away*

Bensch, Tru, Terra and Pepper: Your moment will come, I swear. You have good moments, too. With books and ribbons.

Dane: I hate you. *slaps him*

Verjinya: STOP CRYING, GIRL. *slaps her*

Petria. Well, now that I know your backstory, it makes more sense. I'm sorry you ever looked at Dane? *pats on shoulder* And it just gets worse for you, too. I'm sorry. See, here's some nice chocolate! You like chocolate, right?

Appel: *laughs* I don't actually know your backstory, or what you have hidden in that room of yours, or what illegal activities you're engaged in. But I'm sure they're VERY interesting. And your tattoo is shiny.

Jennet: I'm sorry... *hugs her* But you're too smart to not know the truth.

Tanner and all the Guardians: I'M SORRY!!!!!! I NEEDED DEATH SCENE!

Kael: I would apologize, but you brought it all on yourself. And you know this. Look, it does get better, eventually. So don't get too drunk, please? Uh, Tenish, could you watch Kael please? She's gone off to hurt herself again...

Dulamon: You might be one of my favorite characters of all time. So I send creepy women your way and set you on fire. Huh. CAUSE I KNOW YOU CAN HANDLE IT!!! And the message thing was really sweet, it really was. Too bad she never got the messages and settled for cutting herself instead. Yep, you fail, man. Maybe I'll give you a second chance?

Howling: Uh, please no torture? I mean, what would be the point of that? Uh, don't answer that. I'll just stay on the other side of the 'verse, thank you. Stay away. I will shoot you with a flame thrower!

I like my story. :D

"Why should I do anything you tell me?" "Oh, I can be persuasive."

Oh my word, sore hands. *cries over them* Typing 5,865 words in a day will do that to a body. 

Yep, my word count is now 35,865 words, which is less than 1k off target. And speaking of targets, I may as well officially acknowledge that my target is not 50,000. It's 100,000. This did not come about intentionally, as I did not intend to have such an ungainly story that I have only hit the plot today. But since it is huge, and probably will not even be finished within 100,00, in the interests of finishing the story I'm being insane. 

Yes, the line between madness and genius is so thin somethings, isn't it? *thinks* Pretty tricky, that. 

The problem with writing these posts at night is that my brain usually surrendered about an hour before I start in on Blogger. I believe I mentioned this before. But I got to beat up Kael and Haggerty, again, and do a flashback of Kael's which makes me happy. And I also got to get rid of Jennet's useless friends, which means that the cool people, the smart and arrogant ones, not just arrogant, are showing up really soon. Oh, and I knocked Neph unconscious, but he's used to that. 

In other incoherent news, here is the soundtrack I was listening to to prepare for nano. Now it changes daily, but still. The names in brackets are if the song is specifically for a certain person, other wise it's just the whole universe.

• Hide and Seek, Imogen Heap (Jennet)
  
• Ill-M-I, Tobymac (all the 57th EF)
  
• Get Me Through December, Allison Krauss and Natalie McMaster
  
• Ironic, Alanis Morissette
  
• Into the Ocean, Blue October (Jole (to the max))
  
• To America We Go, Ashley McIssac, (Etna)
  
• Move Along, All-American Rejects
  
• Hurt, Johnny Cash (Kael)
  
• Blow Me Away, Breaking Benjamin (Haggerty)
  
• Love Song, Sara Bareilles
  
• Anywhere Is, Enya
  
• Adrenaline, Gavin Rossdale
  

And yes, I stole alot of this from Bahnree, but I steal most of what I DO from her. So there. 

"You keep talking but it makes no sense."

Total Word Count: 10,437

Word Count of the Day: 2,798

I'm beginning to be a trifle worried about my novel. I'm at over 10k, and I just finished the first day, story-wise. So it looks to be slightly epic. Not that I didn't know and fear this before, but it's different to have the stats presented to you. huh.

But I did figure out a couple of things that worried me regarding Kael, the girl who fights with anything that looks at her. :D She and Tenish have a brother-and-sister thing going on, which clears up some big question marks as to exactly how they insult and abuse each other. Oh, and Kael is also probably also in love with a guy back home, her "teacher." He just appeared in my head with a treasonous backstory and lots of air miles. And he's not middle-aged and/or married. He's tall, and has glasses, and muddy hair. He also can break you with his mind, yes YOU, and is one of the few people who can keep Kael under control. She certainly can't. :D

So overall I like it.

"This is not your moment to shine. This is your moment to fall on your face."

So, I'm gonna try and start to write again. To get me back in the mood, I'm doing a quiz! *grins maniacally*

Rules:
1. Choose a few of your own characters. Five at the most one at the least.
2. Make them answer the following questions.
3. Feel free to go ahead and add some question yourself!!

I choose...

1. Lynn
   
2. Adelheid
   
3. Irene
   
4. Herr Bruno
   
5. Kael
   

How old are you?

1. 16
   
2. 19
   
3. 20
   
4. Why are you asking me this? Get out of my Kitchen!
   
5. Depends on what calendar you're using, thou oh-so-intelligent. I'm old enough to take care of myself.
   

Do you have any bad habits?

1. Only according to my Parents.
2. I'm quiet? People keep dying, but it's NOT my fault.
3. My temper can get rather dramatic. I am not joking. If you want to keep your house in one piece, it's not a good idea to anger me.
4. Putting up with the IDIOTS who populate my kitchen!
5. No. These scars are old. And if you touch me, I'll hurt you.

Who’s your mate/spouse?

1. What part of "I'm 16" do you not get? Though I'm engaged. Kind of. Maybe. Uh- Next question!
   
2. I'm single. 
3. The last guy I went out with had to have his memory wiped. Any other questions?
4. I am married to my art. PUT DOWN THAT SALT CELLAR OR I WILL GUT YOU.
5. It's illegal to be married. I have my sisters.

Have any kids?

1. None that I know of!
   
2. Did Margerete put you up to that question?
   
3. What kind of question is that? I just told you I'm single! And yes, I'm old-fashioned. Get over it.
4. *is busy beating the person who dropped a bowl of strawberries*
5. Me, allowed to have kids? That's a joke.

Favorite food?

1. Katie's hot chocolate. I could live on that stuff.
   
2. The little spring eel pies that Margerete makes with the gravy and the vegetables, and the crust so shiny...
3. Lemon bars. But without coconut, and just browned, so the top cracks when you cut into it. Lovely!
4. I love all food. EXEPT THE SLOP THEY SERVE IN OTHER KITCHENS! 
5. Well, here, I suppose I'd have to say the contraband bread from the worker's level was awfully good.  Aside from that, food isn't a point of interest.

Favorite Ice cream flavor?

1. Piscachio.
2. I'm sorry? What?
3. Grasshopper pie. Or rocky road. Or cherry chip. Or Rolo. Or- oh, for goodness sake, any ice cream I can get shipped in solid is marvelous.
4. Ice cream? Iced Cream. Hmm, that sounds interesting. MARTIN! Bring me the cream and the ice shavings, and Martin, bring me some strawberries...
5. I'm no favorite. I don't get treats. Who are you anyways?

Killed anyone?

1. I'm pretty sure I'd have been told. Pretty sure. Unless-
2. I say prayers for their souls every day.
3. He deserved it.
4. I prefer to keep those who have sinned where they can repent of their transgressions against the culinary world. For a LONG time.
5. I- don't remember.

Hate anyone?

1. Takes too much effort.
2. No. Loathe though, I can manage.
3. "Hate"implies that they're on my level.
4. YOU! What are you doing with that pie?!!!??? *hurls a knife* No, why do you ask?
5. Not a person, exactly. I try not to think about them.

Any secrets?

1. I wasn't there. I was in Grand Bank. Grand Bank, I tell you!
2. Next Question.
3. Not unless you include the alternate identity, and the gift- and you don't remember me saying any of that. Right?
4. No.
5. Withholding information isn't the same as lying about it, right? I mean, they don't know about it, but they don't need to, right? And not telling the Observers things is totally not even an issue. And the- you know, I'm just going to say no, and leave it there.

Love anyone?

1. Michael. Just joking! Just joking...
2. I followed my brother across the world to bail him out. Does that count?
3. You touch my family, you die. Tell whoever sent you that. 
4. What is the point of this question?
5. Not now. Not anymore. Not here.

What is your job?

1. I'm a student. Though Katie seems to want me to work at McDonalds. It's in discussion.
2. I work in the kitchen. And I pour wine at the high table. 
3. I'm the only person on this island, what do you think?
4. I am master of the kitchen. And the cellars. And the docks. 
5. You really are not the highest rating, aren't you? Look at my ident code. It has "drudge" in the TITLE!

Are you a boy or a girl??

1. Boy
2. Girl
3. Woman
4. Man
5. Girl

Family?

1. Two parents. 
2. One brother, but he's under sentence of death. And it's my fault.  I WILL break him out.
3. Daddy, Muv, Pete, Ally, Mike, John, Geoff, Jane, and Sally.
4. They died in the winter when I was a child.
5. I'm the only one left.

Best Friends?

1. After that weekend, I think I can count on Allison, Michael, Katie, Ben and Kathleen to stand by me. I'm not saying I like them though.
2. Margerete is amazing. And Brother Hugo. But I can't trust anyone else, right now. I shouldn't even trust them, really.
3. Back at home, a couple.
4. *doesn't answer*
5. Me? You've got me mixed up with someone people like.

What was the most surprising moment in your life up until now?

1. When Mr. X shot that man. I don't even know his name.
2. When it turned out that Herr Adolf knew who I was. I'm still not sure where that is going.
3. The first time I flew was very memorable. 
4. When my assistant made a flawless cake. I could not have done better myself. Then I knew who my successor must be.
5. When I first saw fire summoned. That was a good day.

Where would you rather be?

1. Out of this dead-end town?
2. Safe. Just somewhere where I could relax.
3. Oxford.
4. Why would I want to be anywhere else?
5. In the UO. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Ever kissed anyone that's not a family member?

1. A couple girls, yeah. A lot, actually.
2. Who do you think I am?
3. Thankfully, no.
4. This interview is over. *walks away*
5. Kissed? Uh, it didn't mean anything, I'm sure.